Should I or Shouldn't??

When I got my first job as a writer, I impressed myself at the start. For a little while. A very little while... I quickly realized that this was not what I wanted to be writing. It was writing articles for my group in our company, and everything sounded the same. I even used templates: insert team names here, customize this line, fit in photographs, arranging marriage dates and child birth congratulation notes. EEEEhhhhhhh, It was horrible. But yet writing :)

I managed to add some spice to that assembly line and moved up to new media: A news letter ;) The news scripts were my favorite; I actually got to be a bit creative, but even there the top management could put an end to it at a moment's notice. The websites were more administrative and editorial. Once to get an approval on a single line from the President of group took me 13 reminders to him 10 to his Secy and another few telephone calls :( By the time approval arrived the article itself became outdated as usually technologies get outdated before approval for projects arrive in my company ;)

The news letter work eventually went away due to changes at that work place, and then about a four months later, which was last November, everything changed.

I was asked to join the monthly magazine. It was like a great deal of opportunity. I had access to some of the crudest facts, plans, people and power :) - but with work, I could do (would have to do) from home. I was set free to be a writer, the creative writer that jumped out of the grass when I was of tender age. But it wasn't that simple the time lines were strict and nothing could change them. A delay from our side would have left us straight in the firing line without any cover. We were a team of 6 people. 6 people and everyone of us was just a part time writer and was time for a major release for everyone of us. The yearly issue. After 4 sleepless nights and fuzzy days I came up with 7 articles that could be brought forward for review by the team. Review went quite well 3 articles were marked to be published. Was a memorable issue for all of us.

All in all being a part of the team is one of the good things that has happened to me in past one year or so :)

That is what I've always wanted. But there is something in the way. I just can't seem to get a hold of the stories' ends. I have too many ideas to know where to start, but when I try to pick one, there is a block. Loads of shit, kinky and crappy stuffs flows out. Once a friend said I have been writing but seems only for and about other people so this. So was he sure what he was saying? Not maybe as a whole, but surely quite a bit of him was true. Now I have this splendid opportunity in front of me to be part of another team. This time expanding my horizon from one organization to Electronic Media. And now I have the opportunity to write for myself. But again I fear would I be able to write till end before something else pops in? Would I be able to do justice to my thoughts? Would it be worth it? Would my parents allow me to do so? Many questions or just, This is where I am today, trying to overcome chronic writer's block.