There has been a voice in my head lately. Another battle begins. This time, the irrational side of me has badly beaten me. Of course, when it comes to a huge depletion in the inner-self, it's better be an impulse that cause it. It has to. So maybe I've reached nirvana today by all the pain. I hear this calling... It's been calling for me, Staring right at me.. I believe it's a sign! Again a fucking sign, haunting and daunting me. One that insists the difference between 'things good to have' and 'things must have'. I believe it has also been a battle of the mind when it comes to that.
Still the so-called rationale side of me still has that tiny bit of lucky streak over it's side and that is why she is not sitting around. This very moment, i could have been staring at it.. playing with it.. maybe even fondling with it. *ahem* I have even prepared the world. Imagined it all around me.
So many encounters just when the world was ripped apart... I believe when it is destined that you would screwed one of the big time the entire universe conspires for the same. That very and every moment I don't have any emotions and neither do I try to get one from back of my brain. But still why has it always be that way.
It has to be it. It was lost and it's meant to be found, if not, forgotten and respected for all those lovely feelings that it gave.
So this morning, again I had some intuition and I tried every way by the book trying to avoid it but, again it... darn it, would it end or another freaking sign that it wouldn't ever :(
I need a break from all this, and god trust me I'm not at all ready and prepared for all the signs or your tantrums that you're throwing on me. Any ways as usual the take away: Life is tough and can seriously burn you giving you some of the worst boils just when you thought it was as you desired.
But to overcome all that can anyone tell me a way by which I can be rational with all my principals intact and please if you know please do tell me...
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